Category Archives: Self

Time flies

Growing up has always been a part of our life but unfortunately we never consciously get to know “that” fact. Its only when you spent some quiet time alone, you realize that something has changed. One more interesting thing about growing up is that you never grow uniformly. And this uneven growth is what defines our personalities.

Its been more than 6 years now I have been writing and maintaining this blog. When I started, I could never imagine that it will survive for six long years. In all these years, the blog has not really kept pace with my time. Sometimes it went ahead and sometimes languished behind, but it has always been a companion. In this process, the blog has been through many changes in its avatars and even saw one name change. It all happened.

There was a time when I used to post twice or thrice or even more in a month and there came a time when I dint posted anything for almost months together. But silently, quietly it has always been there, observing and witnessing this growing up. People came and went, things happened, life happened, and this blog saw everything unfolding. It also saw the birth of two new blogs, one that is personal diary and other, nirvanatrails about the new hobby/interest, photography.

It has given me an opportunity to know many people, which I may not have known in its absence and which contributed to the growth as I mentioned earlier. Directly or indirectly it became the reason for/behind many things. It introduced me to writing. It taught me to express myself in a better way which was true blessing for introvert like me.

Here’s hoping to continue this journey, for times to come.

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Questions !!!

What am I doing here? Is there any purpose? If there is any purpose, why am I wondering like a nomad? Who brought me here and for what?

What am I suppose to do now? Karma? What for? Why? And most importantly how?

Nobody asked for my permission before getting me here !! No talks, discussion, consent. Nothing. Now why should I follow the rules? Rules? Who made these rules? Society? Who gave them right to decide what I am suppose to do? What is good and what is right? Why should I follow the definition of right and wrong by the society.

Is society perfect after it defined right and wrong? Has rules and law made this world better place? No? Then why should I fucking follow them.

Just a passing thought

on a day like this….

As you grow old

Time changes.. circumstances change..
values change.. priorities change..
perception changes.. people change..
ralationships change.. lyfe changes..

…..but memories ramain.. unchanged, unaffected, intact.
11th July o8

The Untold Saga

The other day I found myself without pen in the lecture and I had to borrow it (how pathetic) from someone else. It wasn’t for the first time but this incident made nostalgia struck me like a seawave, the whole affair…. the intimate and one of a kind with the beautiful thing called PEN.

There have been myriad of experiences with the pen.
I was never a brand conscious or never cared to think of using any other colour then ubiquitous blue… Until one day when I was in class 9th when one of my teacher after so called analysis of my writing suggested to use a black pen… According to her, placing of words and distance between two words in my writing meant that I have lot of things running in my mind and I am not able to express myself and this kind of writing will look good in black….
I am still wondering what she meant by this but since then I am using only black pen….

There was a time in school when I tried all kinds and types of pens be it gel or ink or ball point, but finally I settled for ball point pen and that too only Mitsubishi black ( I know its a news for many people that Mitsubishi also makes pen.)
I am religiously using Mitsubishi pens for past almost 10 years. Its funny but I used to tell my friends in school childishly that if this company stops making the pen, I will stop writing….!! And still when I meet those friends they curiously ask me “Do you still use Mitsubishi black pen?” only to get a big smile from me….

One honest confession…. the secret is out now….
Not many people know this but I used to collect empty refills of my black pen…. I still have those…. and here I am laughing at it…. bizarre it was….

There is one more interesting aspect about me and my pens…. I keep losing them… I really hate someone asking me for my pen because noone bothers to return it.
My college library was one unforgettable place for me where I had lost more then 50 pens in 5 years and I used to wonder how to react when the librarian herself used to ask for pen….

After so much blabbering about pen, how can I forget the PENCIL….? NO matter who the person is, he or she must have had pencil in the hand at first attempt of writing in his or her lyfe…. The journey starts from here…. so all you educated, learned, intelligent people out there should express your gratitude towards pencil… Lolz…

I was shopping for books and landed up in stationary section of the store and out of curiosity bought one box of pencil because it’s been ages since I have bought a pencil. I used to take it from my cousins studying in school whenever I needed one so I never knew that simple thing like pencil have been hit so hard by inflation and became expensive…)

When I was in school there were two major brands of pencil, Natraj and Apsara… and I never liked Natraj because it came in red colour and preferred Apsara because of its black and silver colour. And I dint quite understood the technicality of types and kinds of pencils such as HB HP and what not… I preferred HP because to me it simply meant Hitesh Patel….

I still prefer writing with pencil wherever possible because I just love the sound of friction between graphite and paper while writing…. I can’t get enough of it….

Interestingly I never liked any sophisticated penpencil and enjoyed simple traditional wooden pencil and yes I hate pencil with eraser on top…. it looks ugly….
Pencil – A thin graphite stick covered with wood, as simple as that, right….? Wrong, as a small kid I used to wonder how the hell they put this black thing inside the wood…. Lols….

BTW have you ever wondered sharpening the pencil is an art and the waste that comes out as a result of sharpening can tell you lot about your skill and the quality of the pencil….

Isn’t it amazing…. what say……?

That’s it for the time being about this untold saga. Time for you to refresh the memories entwined around omnipresent pen and pencil in your lyfe…. meanwhile ill go and sharpen my pencil….

AHA Moments of Lyfe….

They rightly say we miss out on small moments of joy in pursuit of bigger ones. It’s not only the big achievements and feats and accolades that counts, you have got to learn and enjoy smaller things that makes you happy and makes you learn to enjoy and understand the nuances of lyfe….

These are some random Aha moments (!!!) as I like to call them, which are adding up that extra bit of fun and happiness in my lyfe which effortlessly brings smile on my face reminding that the lyfe is beautiful – its worth living every moment……

> An evening on beach

> Buying a new book (And the best part is, I read them too…. J)

> Glancing through frozen times.

> Posting a blog entry and getting a comment.

> Spending Sunday evening with friends over gentlemanly deeds. (Needs no further explanation)

> Listening to Friday Night Love Show by Fali was one such moment.

> Nostalgia in the moments of solitude.

> Reading “Cosmic Uplink” in ET editorial early in the morning.

> Random discussions with friends over a dose of caffeine at CCD.

> Listening to With Or Without You after short hiatus.

> Dressing up in black on anyday anytime….

> Being alone in crowd.


These are not the only but some of the many of those AHA Momentz…. How about yours…..?

This one is for Lexical lyfe…..

Sometimes, the urge to write is so strong that this is the kind of output it eventually brings out…

The use of English has been confined to communicating when needed, reading and writing off late, it has hardly taken a dominating role in my common parlance but then too some of the words in English has assumed greater importance in life and these are the word which I like most and which dominates my thinking and personality in some way or the other.

So, here it goes…..

‘We all need little bit of MADNESS in our lives.’ Yours truly once said this.
MADNESS is the word which has always attracted me for its ability to generate positive vibes (you can always disagree). It has a dash of arrogance to it.
It is certainly the word I am trying to inculcate in my life.

‘I believe in KARMA.’ You will find this line somewhere here in this blog. A word adopted in English from Sanskrit which literally means all of your actions will have equal repercussions, affecting you.
I am still trying to understand and comprehend the theory of KARMA but one thing for sure I like the whole concept. This covers whole lot of traits such as values, principles and ethics which forms the basis of the KARMA.

INERTIA has been always strong in my case. Its kind of inbuilt mechanism in my mind which makes its presence felt in the thoughts and behavior to certain extent.
And another thing, to be very frank I like the way it sounds, certainly one of the most beautifully sounding word in my dictionary.

I like RANDOM things. I like things randomly which does not have set pattern and has ability to surprise at times. How about RANDOM life….?
In recent past it has been the case as far as the life goes and let me confess that I am loving it.

MELANGE: A varied mixture of various elements.
MELANGE of colours… MELANGE of emotions… and an abstract MELANGE… aah…
It’s very interesting to put this word in the various aspects of life. Something that says there are no extremes in life. Little bit of this and little bit of that, basically a MELANGE of interpretation.

Last but not the least, ‘LIFE’. I guess this is the most overused word in my dictionary with gamut of meanings. So simple but yet so complicated.
LIFE = Feelings, Dreams, Reality, Insanity, Passion, Sadness, Serendipity, Nostalgia, Money, fame and all other shit that you can think of.
This word covers the world in itself; I believe this word can not be defined absolutely. There’s always room for ones own interpretation.
I don’t know why but I always feel that it should be spelt as LYFE and not LIFE but as always it always can’t be the way you want it to be.
Such is LYFE…..!!! I mean LIFE….

That’s it for now….